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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jul 2006

    Default How to be a "Chinese" Parent (Humor)

    I love The Onion.,18858/

    <H2 class=title>New Parenting Book Sparks Outrage

    Last week, Penguin Press published Amy Chua's book Battle Hymn Of The Tiger Mother, which criticizes "Western" parenting and advocates an "Asian" approach that includes forbidding playdates and being highly critical of children in order to make them more successful. Here are some other tips from the book:
    • Take your children to Chuck E. Cheese's and let them play any game they choose, then make them watch as you burn their tickets
    • Ice cream is a great motivator for kids; promise them that if they do everything you ask, they can have some when they turn 18
    • Inform your child that televisions receive all of their power from flawless renditions of Brahms' Violin Concerto in D
    • Only let your children have a pet dog if they can tame the most rabid dog at the pound
    • Should your child express interest in spending more time with his or her friends, simply pack up and move several hundred miles away
    • To ensure academic excellence, inform your children that there is a mark higher than an A-plus and then shame them for failing to attain it
    • Replace their frail little limbs with less fragile prosthetics
    • Remember, you may have to put up with one or two suicides before you finally craft that perfect child you've always wanted
    Last edited by BabyMine; 01-21-2011 at 03:15 PM.
    M - my 7 yo ADHD/anxiety monkey.
    TT - my 4yo tiny terror.

    "Swimming is not a sport. Swimming is a way to keep from drowning. That’s just common sense!" "I don’t have a fear of heights. I do, however, have a fear of falling from heights." “No comment” is a comment."
    "The reason they call it the American Dream is because you have to be asleep to believe it." "Atheism is a non-prophet organization."
    - George Carlan

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Mar 2009
    DC Suburbs


    Heh heh. The Onion is great.
    Mommy to my wonderful, HEALTHY twin girls
    6/08 - Preemies no more!

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jan 2006


    LOL! OT, but I laughed at an article on the bottom of that page about the guy who wasn't going to do anything fun/live for himself until his parents died. Talk about being brainwashed by parental expectations!

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